More Than I Can Handle?

                                 

You know that phrase "God Doesn't Give You More Than You Can Handle"?

I think its crap.

I do. I think that if that were true He would have to believe that I am super woman. And, I don't think He believes that. As a matter of fact, I KNOW He doesn't think that! 

These past two weeks were - oh, lets just say they were "challenging"? But, I have come out the other side and am ready to look back and debrief. I have to. Because I know that I will have other challenging days, weeks and months and I will have to make it through those as well. 

About 2 weeks ago, my husband left on a short deployment. No big deal - it was only a couple weeks, something we are becoming very accustomed to. I was a little apprehensive, which struck me as strange, but I attributed it to the fact that I am pregnant and have 3 littles to keep alive - on my own. So, off he went. 

That same day I received a phone call. My father-in-law was not well. Not well as in - needed me to pack up the kids at 5pm and drive an hour and a half away to check on him.  Okay, I got this. Was able to leave the littles with a good friend, which was a blessing as an ambulance was needed and off to the hospital we went. 

For that entire week I spent hundreds on gas as I drove back and forth between home and my father in law's hospital. Thank God he pulled through and that I was able to be there for him. By Friday he was off to rehab to regain strength and recover fully. 

Okay, a little stressful but - hey - emergencies happen, right? Things were totally going to get back to normal now!

So, Friday morning I sat sipping my coffee while the littles pretended to sleep (I threaten majorly anyone who comes out before 7am!) and put together my waaaaay overdue grocery list. 

Once everyone was up my son mentioned that the baby felt warm.

 Ha. Yeah, okay dude. 

Totally disregarded that one. As in, completely forgot to check her.

 A couple hours later - the baby felt warm. 102 read the thermometer. Awesome. 

Okay, no big deal - probably a little fever virus. It will pass. 

So, 24 hours later, Saturday night - I packed up all three littles again and headed back to the Emergency Room. This time for a toddler who's temp wouldn't go lower than 104 and was now wheezing and barking. AWWWWESOME. 

As crazy ER doctor muses that a spinal tap and septic blood work up may be in order (reeeeally dude? Give us a steroid shot and meds for the fever and send us on our way!) I gave in to a momentary lapse in control. My stomach began to churn. 

** warning** the next few lines are gross, but reality is gross sometimes. And here at Blessings, Grace and Wine, I keep it real. And,  I am sure that - pregnant or not - everyone has been here!

I sat on that hospital bed with a feverish, sick baby and two bored littles and my stomach began to hurt. I began to gurgle and sweat before I realized I needed a bathroom. ASAP. Really? A stress & pregnancy induced IBS attack HERE?! In this gross, crowded, people-lying-on-stretchers in the hallway emergency room? I stood up to find a bathroom quick when my little sick monkey screamed in protest. 

So, off I went to the bathroom down the hall, with the baby holding tight.

After I was done, baby still wrapped tightly around my neck, I apologized, deeply, to those lying outside the bathroom door. And again when I returned. And then again a third time. 

At this point, after I refused the spinal tap and blood work and the steroid shot and fever meds had begun their miraculous work, I informed the nurses that we needed to leave. NOW. It had been 5 hours. Baby was better. But to be honest. I didn't care. I was done. I was ready to go home. 

It took a few days for the cranky, sick baby to return to just the cranky baby and hubby surprised us by coming home a couple days early. Father in law is leaving rehab and returning home tomorrow and things are slowly returning to normal. 

Or course they are. Daddy is home now. 

My nightmare is over. For now. He leaves again in a week. lol

But, guess what, moms??!  We ALL go through these nightmares! We ALL have circumstances that we go through and our friends shake their heads and say - man, I don't know how you do it. But, guess what? We do it. We do it because its just what we have to do. 

Its not like I woke and up thought, hm - feeling pretty super human this week, so, life - bring it on. 

Ha.

Nope. 

But, life brought it anyway. And, I dealt with it. Not because I'm awesome. Because I'm mom. 

Because my littles needed me to. Because my father in law needed me to. Because it was what I had to do. 

This week is bringing its own challenges - and I will face those head on too. 

With faith - I couldn't do this alone. With stubborn pride. And, with GRACE. 

Because God DOES give us more than we can handle, the difference is - He doesn't expect us to do it alone. 

He is right there by our side, and gives us angels to help us along the way. 

I am grateful for my angels these past few weeks, and for the Grace that enveloped me when I thought I had reached the end of my ability to deal. 

And, of course, for the lesson in humility as I sat with sick baby on my lap, letting go, in that emergency room bathroom. 

Hang in there moms. You absolutely can handle this, you can get through it, and you will come out the other side stronger and far more confident. Just remember, Grace and Angels. Grace and Angels. 

 

Say "NO" to Blogs!

 

                                                              

I know, I know ~ the irony, huh? 

But, seriously. No more blogs, moms. No more parenting websites or Pinterest. No more Facebook groups. We need to unite as moms and just start saying no! 

The problem? 

Well, I don't know about you but here is the majority of what I see:

100 Things Your Daughter Should Learn Before She Goes to College

100 Things to Teach Your Son Before He Becomes A Man

9,000 Ways to Teach Your Child Character

Why You Should Never Leave the House

Home Cooked Meals and How You Too Can Provide One Every Night

How to Make Your Crazy Toddler Normal Again

Teach Your Children to ...............Do Anything and Look Gorgeous Doing It. 

Okay, okay - you see where I am going with all this? Now, don't get me wrong. There is a lot of information out there that is so incredibly helpful. But, more often than not, it is simply overwhelming and brings you down instead of encouraging you. 

I mean, 100 Things Your Daughter Should Know Before She Goes to College? Come on moms! We do not need to read stuff like that! Instead of wasting our time stressing over whether we will remember to teach our (currently 5 year old) daughter to change a tire is ridiculous. And, of course we are going to teach our sons to respect women, to be patient and courageous. To be men of integrity. 

We have our own character and integrity, and we need to start trusting it. Instead we browse all these wonderful parenting blogs, helpful websites and overzealous Facebook groups. And, don't even get me started on Pinterest! We need to stop. 

Now, I am not saying that when we run into a specific problem that we shouldn't seek help, of course we should. But, lets first look to books, other normal, down to earth friends and maybe - oooh - just maybe moms who have made it through to the other side! Now there is a wealth of information and encouragement! 

See, we all struggle with making sure we are remembering to teach all the right things ((um, homeschool mom here - you can't get more "struggle" than that!)) but we waste our time on sources that only make us wish we were doing more. On places that make us think that most moms have it together. That most moms actually cook a real, home cooked meal 6 or 7 times a week. 

** disclaimer** IF YOU ACTUALLY DO THAT, DO NOT TELL OTHER MOMS. CUZ, WE DON'T*****

We waste our time browsing sites that will help us "get organized" but instead make us look around our disaster zones wondering where we went wrong. Oh Pinterest - I love you and hate you. I love the fact that you have shown me perfection is, by some weird soul, somewhere on earth - achievable and yet I and hate you for the same. 

Guess what moms? 

Your toddler will totally be normal again - when they turn 25 and have their own baby. 

Your house will be clean and beautiful again - and you will want to run from the quiet that engulfs you. 

Your children will learn character - by watching YOU. 

Your sons and daughters will learn everything they need to know by the time they leave, and if they don't?? They will call home to ask. 

And, finally - peanut butter and jelly is totally fine for dinner at least twice a week, as long as there is love and conversation around the table. 

Come on moms, jump off this crazy "Read my Blog" roller coaster (um, clearly there are exceptions......) and come back to the reality of your own, individual family. We need to stop focusing on if we are doing it right and just start trusting ourselves and enjoying the few, precious years we have with our little ones. 

So, join with me and say no to all these wonderful websites, blogs and articles that are not encouraging! 

Instead, call a dear friend, read an age old, trusted BOOK, or just talk with someone who has survived this whole parenting thing! 

 

Good luck today moms, and remember - we are all in the same boat, struggling with the same things! 

But, these years are short and your littles will make it through just fine, whether you are a perfect mom today or not!